Broke.

Having the weekends off sucks big time, especially when you're fucking broke. like seriously. all i have in my pockets is lint. oh payday, please arrive soon.

too much "emergency spending" this month. April, be kind to me.

kids.

i'll be honest. i'm not the biggest kid-loving chick out there. though let me be clear, i still do think of having a couple of my own one day (i hope that will be a distant future..) just to know what kind of parent i would make, but still, sometimes i see annoying, spoilt kids, this goes through my brain.

i'm a firm believer of tough love and discipline on kids, it'll do them a world of good when they don't grow up to be stupid douchebags, y'know.

revenge.

So, I'm Not Just Being Paranoid.

"she hates us, both of us. and i'm not just making up stories, a few others noticed it too... your own mentor told me the other day to watch out because Bitchy Senior Co-Worker is aiming for us."

those were the words told by a colleague as we were on our way home together just recently. she's a junior as i am and we both had endured the same type of hell from Bitchy Senior Co-Worker ever since we started working.

Thank God! there's someone else out there who is just as tortured as i am! all this time, i thought i was the only one being stepped on, and even blamed myself for being exceptionally stupid to get bullied like hell.

but hey, how come my own mentor never acknowledged the fact that i'm being aimed by BSCW in front of me? at least it'll not make me feel like a paranoid freak.

Time.

it's funny how time works on characters.

over the weekends i had the chance to hang out with an old acquaintance from my A-level years. it's been so long since we saw each other, but we chatted like we're close friends that see each other everyday. and he's still the same guy as i remembered - super nice, a gentleman, and still loves to remind everyone that he's Hindustani, not Tamil. haha. makes me smile every time.

on the other hand, randomly found the profile page of another acquaintance from my A-level years. back then, he was the geeky boy that tried too hard to impress others. had that classic image of an overachieving Asian kid -- geeky specs, thin-ass frame, clean-cut image. but as i quietly stalk his profile, oh boy has he changed. no more geeky specs (learnt how to put on contacts? Lasik, maybe?), definitely more muscle on that body, lip piercings, cigarettes, electric guitar. he oozes the laid-back, bad boy charm now. oh wow.

i'm fascinated at the thought that years can go by and a person could still be the same, while others would have made a one-eighty turn in characters in the same length of time. i wonder, have i changed? or am i still the same?

hmm.

Bitchy Senior Co-Worker has been oddly nice these days. no more snide remarks sent my way, offering to buy food, heck, even affectionately called me "adik" as opposed to referring to me strictly by my full name.

it's weird.

suspicious, in fact.

i feel like something's up...

meow

meow.