Birthday wishlist!

1) makeup brush set. And i mean a good set. Been eyeing the Sephora brushes, Sigma brushes and the Real Techniques brushes.

2) Naked palette. Any of the Naked palette range would do for me. If someone could give me all 4 sets, i would love the person with all my heart until the day that i die. But just getting the Naked 3 or the Naked basic would make me a happy girl.

3) Fossil rose gold watch. Been eyeing the one identical to the one i have, but in rose gold. Because i like simple things that i can wear daily to work. Nothing with diamonds on them... just because diamonds can fall off..

4) a good perfume. I have loads of perfume wishes on my list... Pure White Linen by Estee Lauder, Untold by Elizabeth Arden, See by Chloe, quite a number of Victoria's Secret scents, well in short, one can't go wrong with gifting me a bottle(or two, or four..) of perfume.

5) a vacation package. Preferably near the beach or a bustling city centre. Even more preferably one that is not in Malaysia. Extra love if flight tickets are included. :)

Well hey, it's just a wishlist. I'm not putting a gun to anyone's head to get them for me. It's just to say that i'll be really really really happy to get one or more of these for my birthday. Though i know most of my closest people in my life probably couldn't afford them as gifts. I understand. In fact, even if i don't get my wishes from someone else, these are things that i would spoil myself with with my own money anyway. :)

heart. break.

i feel broken.

i feel stupid.

i feel ugly.

i feel disgusted with myself.

i feel insecure.



they say love like you've never been hurt before. so i did. i opened my heart, i give second chances.

somehow it always proves to be a mistake, to give second chances.

i thought, "seems different this time, he looks sincerely interested."

i thought, "i promise i will not get invested with feelings this time. i'll keep a clear head."

but still when the walls come crashing down, no matter how i tried to keep a clear mind, i always end up getting hurt. end up feeling stupid. end up feeling broken.


maybe it's not for me, this thing called love. i'm just not good enough for someone to love me for me.